Through The Years
by emmaaproctorr
Summary: Dan's now older but not that wiser. When questioned by his daughter he reveals that the love of his life wasn't her mother, but one Blair Waldorf.
1. Chapter 1

"Hey Dad... are you okay?" Amelia looked at her dad with warm eyes.

"I guess" he sighed, his head hitting the back of the chair.

"I know what today is" she said in a small voice. He immediately looked at her with warning eyes.

"What the-"

"Calm down Dad. Mom doesn't know" she tried to calm him down but the betrayal was still visible in his eyes.

"How... How do you know?" he choked, trying to remain calm.

"I was sorting out your books. You have far too many and I found your journal from years ago. When you were in your late 20's. It was... Fascinating. I should've been your first novel" she smiled kindly.

At that moment, Dan Humphrey became overwhelmed with emotion. At 67 years of age, he had an amazing career, a wonderful wife and a beautiful family. He in Vermont now, away from the city. It held too many memories. Memories he tried to forget for the past fourty years.

"I could've been my second novel" he smiled. "But things work out the way they're meant to"

"I couldn't find your journals from before that" she held her father's hand, knowing the inner pain he must be struggling with. "Tell me about her?"

Dan looked at his daughter and smiled, but it wasn't a smile full of happiness. He smiled as if it was the only way to ease the pain but it wasn't working.

"She..." he paused, trying to find the right words. "She was the love of my life" he held onto her dainty hands with a firm grip. "I loved everything about her. Which I found funny considering we hated each other to start with. Couldn't stand her" he chuckled. "But that's how most great loves start off; with hate"

Amelia smiled as her father's eyes glowed remembering her. "What was she like?"

"Perfect" he laughed at his answer. Amelia grinned. "Physically she was very attractive. She had chestnut hair that was always perfectly in place. She had these wonderfully beautiful eyes that were so deep yet warm... She was truly beautiful. But she was so much _more_ than that"

"How so?"

"She just..." he couldn't find the words to describe this girl who was so incredible. "She wasn't like anyone else. She was the most complicated girl I've ever met. Well, that was before you were born" Amelia chuckled at her father's half-hearted joke. "I can't think of words suitable enough to describe her. Amazing, fantastic, wonderful, beautiful... They're not _enough_ to describe her" he frowned, remembering everything about her.

"Tell me about her" she pressed on. Dan looked down, feeling the sadness that he'd been hiding for so long.

"I just did" he breathed.

"No, I want to know everything. She was clearly very special to you" she smiled earnestly at the man she adored most in her life.

"I'll find my old journals later" the corners of his lips moved up into a small smile. "And I'll tell you"

"Thanks Dad"

The silence between them lingered but it wasn't awkward or tense. It was filled with sadness. Amelia feeling sad at how much her father loved someone before Mom. Feeling sad at how much in pain her father was and how it explained why he always seemed down. Dan feeling sad at how he realised after all this time he can still remember every detail about her and feeling sad about how he can't just ring her up to watch a movie or discuss art.

"I'm going to make a cup of tea" Dan dragged himself out of his chair, stretching his legs. "Want one?"

"Yes please" she smiled. He began to slowly walk to the kitchen to put on the kettle when he turned around to smile at his daughter who he loved very much. She noticed this and returned his loving gaze.

"Dad?" she asked quietly. "What was her name?"

"Blair Waldorf"


	2. Chapter 2

It was later on in the afternoon. Dan went out into the garden where his loving wife was gardening.

"Why do weeds insist on growing?" she whines as he sits on a deck chair, enjoying the sunshine with a book.

"Because if they didn't what else would annoy you?" he laughed. Amelia came into the garden then, a book in her hand. She sat on the grass next to her father, soaking up the rays as she flicked through the pages.

"I don't know why you do that" mother moaned. "Just flick through books and select read"

"Because I've read this book hundreds of times" she used her hand as a visor as she looked at her mother. Her silver hair was tied up into a bun and she had speckles on dirt splattered across her face. "I have favourite chapters, moments. So I reread them as they made me smile"

"What ever you say Amelia" she spoke to the weeds she was digging up, determind to have the perfect garden.

"I'm too hot" Dan said matter-of-factly. "I need an ice cold lemonade"

"You sounded so middle class then Dad" Amelia smiled. "I almost forgot you were from Brooklyn"

Dan smiled at her as he made his way indoors. Following closely behind, Amelia stepped inside and closed the door with a slam which made Dan jump.

"You almost gave me a heart attack" he said dramatically. Amelia laughed at his expression and pushed past him to get a glass out the cupboard for him and then the lemonade out of the fridge.

"Can you tell me about her now? Blair?" she saw how his body stiffened at the mention of her name. "Please"

"What do you want to know?" he asked, pretending everything was fine and Blair was a speakable topic.

"I don't know... Just about her. Like how did you meet?"

"Thanksgiving. She thought I was hitting on her best friend Serena-"

"Aunt Serena?" Amelia gasped. Dan nodded. "No way..."

"Small world eh?" he sighed. "Serena was... Well, drunk out of her face. She was almost run over by a cab, you know how New York cabs are" she nodded. "So I pushed her out the way of the car, you know, as you do. And then Blair stormed out and scolded me for being a hero"

"A hero Dad? Really?" Amelia laughed.

"You know what I mean" he smiled. "I of course knew who she was. I had been going to school with her since kindergarden. But she never knew who I was. I was branded 'Lonely Boy'"

"That nickname suits you perfectly" she sneered.

"Anyway" he pressed on. "We hated each other from then on. I spoke to her because of Aunt Serena or Uncle Nate. But hardly ever on our own terms. Not until we 'teamed up' to help Serena. And then I kinda fell for her. Hard" he admitted. He sipped on his lemonade.

"Then what happened?" she pressed on, intrigued.

"Life" he shrugged.

"Don't give me that generic answered" Amelia folded her arms. Dan went to sit on the dining room chair as his back was aching.

"We... We remained friends. We kissed but shortly after she was engaged to a _Prince_" he said with distaste.

"A Prince? What kind of life did she lead?" she gasped, unable to believe that he knew someone who was engaged to a Prince.

"A very extravagant lifestyle to say the least" he grumbled as his back was causing discomfort. Amelia moved closer to her father, wanting to learn more.

"So did she marry the Prince?"

He thought back on the memories. He thought of the way she looked in a white dress, how it highlighted the best features of her figure perfectly. He remember how her dark hair was tied up into a loose bun with a flower perfectly placed in her hair. He remember how she looked as she decided she couldn't go through with it and ran away with him.

"Almost. She was a runaway bride" he smiled, feeling an overwhelming feeling of loss.

"Who did she runaway with?" she asked, wondering why someone would be a runaway bride from a Prince.

"Me"


	3. Chapter 3

The two of them remained in the kitchen, Amelia still desperate to know more yet Dan unwilling to unlock his most hidden memories.

"What happened after that?" she asked. Dan sighed and got up out of his seat and walked out of the kitchen. "Dad?"

"Stay there" he called. She sat there in silence, still coming to terms that he was in love before her mother yet interested in how things turned out. She knew the ending but she didn't know the middle. Dan entered with a battered book in his hand. He sat down and opened it.

"Dear journal" he began. Amelia wasn't to make a comment about the beginning to his entry but felt like it wasn't the right time. "I am the luckiest man in the world" he sighed, sinking further into his chair. "We rushed to the airport and brought tickets to the next flight out of here and it just so happens I'm here in Paris. It's just so beautiful here-"

_The sun shone brightly and reflected off the Seine beautifully. The sky was a clear blue yet there was a gentle breeze so it wasn't too hot. It was a fine day._

_"I reckon I should buy a stripey top to wear..." he said to her. "And a necklace of onions. And one of those hat thingys"_

_"It would be a definite improvement" she fired back with a large grin spread across her face. Dan mocked a hurt expression but the beauty of the situation was too hard to resist a smile in return. "And they're called berets_

_"Thanks for that information Waldorf. I'll remember it for the rest of my life"_

_They walked along the bank of the Siene and was tricked into going on a river cruise. Although it cost more than he wanted it to, he thought it was worth it. He saw all the sights, such as the Notre Dame and of course the Eiffel Tower. He held tightly onto her waist as they stood on the boat, getting sprayed with water and enjoying the day together._

_"You know where I want to go?" he asked._

_"Don't say something obvious like the Eiffel Tower" she said, knowing that would be his thought._

_"No. I want to go to the Notre Dame" he said, smiling._

_"Why?" she asked, intrigued by his wish._

_"There's a plaque on the floor outside the signifies the old centre of Paris" he said as if he knew all about Paris. "And I just want to go there"_

_"Fine. But can we go Eiffel Tower after?" she asked, smiling._

_"I thought that was too obvious Waldorf"_

_"It is. But it's still beautiful" she gazed at him and couldn't help but feel even more in love with him than she already was. "But we need to take you shopping" he laughed and agreed because although he wouldn't enjoy it he knew she would. And that was the most important thing.  
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"Blair wasn't being the impossible person I knew her to be" Dan continued to read on. "She was carefree. She laughed and joked as if she had no care in the world. And it made me love her even more. If that was even possible" he laughed as he remembered that trip to Paris. "I, Dan Humphrey, am in love with Blair Waldorf. If somebody told me this four, five years ago I would've protested, telling them they had it wrong. But she's just so... I can't think of a word good enough to describe her. She took me shopping which was too long for my taste but she was occupied with something that made her happy so I couldn't complain much. I enjoyed seeing her smile again. We had a date on the Eiffel Tower which was something dreams are made of. Today was the perfect day. Today was the day that I realised I love Blair Waldorf more than I ever have before. Today was the day I knew I would love her for the rest of my life"

Amelia sat there, her face plastered with a smile that had been in place for over half an hour as her father read his journal entry.

"Wow" she whispered.

"Yeah" he sighed. "Wow"

They sat there together feeling the connection they had grow stronger over him sharing his memories that were so private.

"I wish I knew what she looked like" she said quietly as if to herself.

"Here" he passed over a picture. It was a picture of two people smiling widely at the camera. It was a picture of a young, handsome man dressed in a stripey top with a beret and onions around his neck with an arm around one of the most beautiful girls she had ever seen in her life, hair hanging naturally down and a slight tan on her skin from a day out in the sun, standing on a road with the Arc de Triompe behind them. It was a picture of two people that were young and deeply in love.

"Wow" she gasped again, realising that his words weren't exaggerated.

"I know. Believe me, I know"


	4. Chapter 4

"What else happened in Paris then?" she asked quietly, still staring at the photo of her father looking like an idiot next to someone so beautiful.

"Nothing much really. We were only there for a few days" Amelia looked at him as if he were stupid. "Yes I know it wasn't exactly a wise decision. An eight/nine hour flight for three days!" he exclaimed. Amelia continued to stare at the picture. "We visited the Louvre, of course. And the Museé D'Orsay. We shopping down the Champs-Élysées and the golden triangle of designer shops where I felt so out of place. We went on dates and went to watch movies... It was just a nice weekend away. A weekend away from reality"

_They were sitting in a café that was in the middle of the Champs-Élysées in the middle of the day where the temperature was unbelievable. Blair sat there wearing a red sundress with nude heels, fanning herself with a menu. Dan sat there watching her adoringly although he was uncomfortable due to wearing jeans as Blair wouldn't allow him to wear shorts._

_"Are you going to let me fan myself then?" she asked, implying that he should pick up a menu and help._

_"I'm fine as I am" he smiled. "I have an air con right behind me..." he waved his arms in the air as if he were king. A king that had a menu thrown at his face. "Hey!"_

_"Sorry" she said, looking at him as he went to pick up the menu off the floor and place it back on the table. "Well, actually I'm not" she teased._

_"Oh Waldorf, you are so going to get it when we're out of here" he sunk into his seat._

_"That sounded so..." Dan raised his eyebrows. "Kinky" Blair let out a laugh as she said it._

_"It could be if you wanted it to be" Dan said, feeling foolish. Blair's cheeks matched the shade of her dress and Dan didn't know whether it was due to the heat or the suggestion just made._

_"Bonjour madame-moiselle" a waiter came over with sandy hair, looking at Blair as if she were the only customer in the place. Dan coughed, trying to subtlely tell him that there was someone else there. "Monsieur. Que voulez-vous?"_

_"Bonjour" she smiled without knowing the effect she had on this poor man. "Nous aimerions ... Deux croque-monsieurs avec deux cafés" she said in a perfect French accent. "Oh, et deux eaux glacées s'il vous plait" the waiter nodded, staring her straight in the eye. "Merci" she spoke and he turned around to get her the order. Dan thought that they would be the first to be served._

_"Wow" he put his hands on the table. "It was like I wasn't even here"_

_"Sometimes I like to pretend that's how it is" she quipped._

_"Harsh" he whispered. "But that French accent..." he took a menu and fanned himself with it, acting like a woman when they see a hot man in the old movies. Blair grabbed the menu and smacked him with it causing them both to laugh harder than they had for a long time. Suddenly Blair's face sunk. "Blair?"_

_Blair forced a smile back onto her face, acting like she didn't just realise that reality was sinking in. Acting like she didn't just think of everything happening back in New York, not thinking about Louis and how hurt he must be. Blair gulped, fixing her eyes on this wonderful man infront of her, looking at her with concern in his deep brown eyes._

_"I'm fine. Just too hot" she groaned. Just as she said that, the waiter rushed out with two ice cold waters and the coffees. Blair took the glass and put it to her face, trying to cool herself down. Dan knew it wasn't the heat but he didn't want to press on. Instead he pretended everything was fine and continued their last day in the City of Lights._

"After all of that" Dan was now out of his chair, going to refill his glass of lemonade. "We went back to the hotel and packed. We got a taxi to the airport and flew home. We didn't speak for a couple of weeks. It was... terrible" he sipped on his lemonade, thinking of her in this awful heat that was just like that day in Paris.

"When did you two speak again?" she asked, still looking at the photo.

Dan sighed. "I'll tell you more later" he put down his glass. "I'll find the journal" he went to leave the room. "Are you sure Mom doesn't know?"

"Positive"


	5. Chapter 5

Dan was now sitting in his study and looking outside his window at his wife who was working hard in the garden, planting some rose bushes. She was in competition with Mrs. Next Door Neighbour over who had the best garden. Dan would find it pathetic if he didn't find it endearing. But it made him feel guilty because he knew he'd much rather see _her_ down there than the woman that he'd spent the last thirty years with.

Dan met Olivia Newman when they were thirty two. Dan was getting his second novel published and Olivia worked in the publishing house. She had dark blonde hair with thich curls and these intense green eyes that intrigued him. They got on really well and made Dan smile. They went on a few dates and one drunken night they slept together. He thought nothing would come of it until she turned up at the loft to tell him she was pregnant. Dan immediately asked her to move in and he was there every step of the way. Thomas Rufus Humphrey was born and in the delivery room Dan proposed to her out of nowhere. She of course said yes and when Tom turned one they had a church wedding with fifty of their closest friends and family. They built a life together. A few years later they had Amelia Rose Humphrey, the daughter who he loved so much. When Tom was twenty he moved to the city to persue his business dreams where he now has a fiancée and a baby on the way. Amelia still lived close by which made Dan happy.

He sat on his desk chair and looked at all of his books. He wrote thirteen in total and was very highly regarded in the business. He was half way through his fourteenth after a few years of not writing. But he needed to get back to what he loved doing.

Amelia knocked on the door and entered quietly, not wanting to disturb him as he was clearly in deep thought. She simply sat on the spare chair and picked up a book that rested on the side.

"It's too hot" he muttered to himself. "Too hot"

"I know Dad" she spoke softly. He turned to look her in the face, slightly surprised to see her. "It's okay Dad" she whispered in his ear. "It's okay"

He took her word for it and sat back in his chair, sinking back into it as he became more relaxed.

"So, what happened after Paris? You said you two didn't talk" she said. "Where's your journal?"

"The blue one on the top shelf" he said without looking. He felt tired. She grabbed it off the shelf and passed it to him. "Read it for me"

Slightly taken aback Amelia did as she was told. "Where shall I start?"

"First page"

"Dear journal" she began, feeling uneasy at how she was reading his private thoughts but excited to know what happened. "Today was difficult-"

_"Blair!" Dan yelled in the middle of the street as she walked off. "Blair don't be silly"_

_"Me? Be silly? Don't you _dare_ Humphrey. Don't you dare call me silly" she spat, anger evident in her voice. "It's your fault"_

_"Why is it my fault?" he exclaimed._

_"You took me away! You stopped me from getting married! My whole life has fallen apart because of you!" She tried to breath to calm her down but it wasn't working. "And you think you can call me silly?"_

_"Waldorf" he grabbed ahold of her hand and she immediately pulled away. "That weekend ment everything to me"_

_"That weekend was a mistake"_

_Dan stood there, unable to think or move. Blair turned away to leave him on the spot in the middle of busy New York and Dan didn't try to stop her._

"The cruelty of her words cut my soul. A mistake? No it wasn't a mistake. But it looked like she meant it. And in that moment my world fell apart" she choked, staring at her father who was sitting in his chair and almost falling asleep. "Shall I continue?"

"Yes" he said, remaining in the same position.

"Okay then..." she said. "All I know is that my love for her is still in tact and that's what hurts the most" she turned the page. "Dear journal. Sorry I haven't wrote for a week but a lot has happened-"

_"Daniel, what are you doing here?" Lily asked as she got up to hug him tightly. "You're going to be in trouble with Eleanor who just went to the toilet so I don't think it's a wise decision to be here"_

_"Maybe you're right" he turned to go. "Can you get Serena to meet me in the lobby?" he asked. Lily nodded and Dan entered the elevator to go back downstairs._

_Ten minutes later Serena appeared. The atmosphere of the room instantly turned happy at the sight of her sunshine hair and cheerful smile._

_"Dan!" she exclaimed and hugged him tightly. "I shouldn't be so happy to see you but... Well, I am"_

_"Thanks" Dan said as he didn't know how to respond to that. "Want to go get coffee?"_

_"Sure!"_

_The two of them walked to the nearest café and he ordered an expresso and she got a hot chocolate with whipped cream. They sat opposite each other, drinking their hot drinks, looking each other in the eye to see who would mention her first. Dan caved in first._

_"Is Blair mad at me?" he asked, putting his cup down._

_"Dan, who isn't mad at you?" she asked with a laugh. "She... She isn't exactly your biggest fan at the moment" she admitted._

_"I don't understand _why _though" he said as if he were asking himself that._

_"You stopped her from getting married to a Prince that had been planned for months on end, you flew her off to Paris so she couldn't deal with it all so everything that happened here she had no decision on and when she came back she had a big mess to sort out. And not a private mess" she spoke as if she was the most wise person in the world._

_"She told me she loved me. What was I supposed to do?" he wiped his face with his hand out of frustration._

_"What?" Serena exclaimed. "Wait... What?"_

_Dan sighed. "The night before the wedding she told me she loved me. She turned up at my loft at 3am, wearing her silk pajamas and her hair in a mess and told me she loved me. She didn't give me a chance to respond because she just left. So what else was I supposed to do?"_

_"Woah" Serena gasped. "Okay then, my mind has been completely changed. Good on you Dan"_

_"Thanks I guess" he picked up his expresso. "But it's not like she would tell anyone else that. So I'm the bad guy in this situation"_

_"Dan you could never be the bad guy in any situation" Serena stroked his hand in reassurance. "Trust me on that one"_

"I enjoyed my meeting with Serena. She made me feel better about my implusive decision. Just as I was walking her home I saw her. She was getting out of a limo but had some trouble. I heard a deep chuckle and then another door opened. Chuck came out and helped Blair out of the car. They looked at each other as if it was the first time they had done so. He walked her inside as if he were a gentleman. Ha, I never thought I would write Chuck and gentleman in the same sentence" Amelia paused, looking at her dad. He just snored, he was clearly in a deep sleep. "Serena told me that nothing was going on between them but I couldn't help but feel the sinking feeling that I got" Amelia grabbed a bookmark and placed it on the page she just finished. She got up and kissed her father on the cheek.

"I love you Dad" she whispered. She left the room when Dan stirred.

"I love you too"


	6. Chapter 6

Dan woke up to the smell of his wife's cooking and he immediately noticed that the room was dark and much cooler. He got up and went to their bedroom to grab a jumper. He marched downstairs and sat on his chair with the newspaper.

"Smells good" he commented as he got out his pen to do the crossword. He sat there in silence, scribbling down answers.

_'Across, 14 - New York socialite that left the current King of Monaco at the alter fourty seven years ago, Blair - (7)'_

Dan gasped, feeling uneasy. Worried about her father, Amelia rushed over to see if he was okay.

"Dad?" she asked concerned. Olivia looked over to witness the scene.

"I'm fine Amelia" he folded up the newspaper and put it on the side. Amelia just stared at him. "Damn it Amelia I said I was fine!" he yelled. Amelia put her head down and went over to sit with her mother.

Olivia sighed. "He's been good for a couple of days. I guess this wasn't unexpected" she stirred the gravy as she spoke.

"I know" Amelia put her head in her hands. "I just hoped-"

"All we can do is hope, Amy" she turned around to hold her daughter in her arms. "Hope is what keeps us going on"

The two women stayed in the kitchen, putting the meal together. "Dad! Dinner!" she called. When she didn't hear a response she moved over to him, bent down and held his hands. "Dad?"

"I'm sorry" he whispered, looking her straight in the eye. "I'm so sorry" he began to sob.

"It's okay Dad, it's alright" she cradled him in her arms, soothing him with her love. "Everything's okay. Come on don't cry, you'll ruin my new vest top"

Dan laughed, and wiped his eyes. "Come on, let me have some dinner"

-

Amelia finished washing up, Olivia was knitting something for Tom's expected child and Dan sat there reading a book. Amelia walked in an caught her Dad's eye.

"Hey" she whispered. He stood up and grabbed her hand. "Where are we going"

"The study" he said simply. She followed him to the study. They sat down in the same places as before but this time he was wide awake. "I'd like to read this time"

Amelia smiled and passed him the navy notebook. "I got to the bit where Chuck helped her out of the car"

"I see" Dan put on his glasses and opened the journal to where a bookmark was placed. "Ah, okay" he settled into place. "Serena as me if I wanted her to stay out with me or some back to the loft but I said I'd much prefer to be alone. It wasn't a wide decision. Whenever you're sad logic would suggest you put on an upbeat song or do something you enjoy. Reality is you put on the saddest song you can think of and become self absorbed in your misery. So that's exactly what I did" he paused. "But then-"

_It was late in the night and Dan had spent the past couple of hours locked in his room reminising everything about Blair, everything about Paris. He was curled up on his bed when there was a knock on the door. He heard it but didn't move as he expected it would be Serena or even worse, Rufus._

_"Dan?" she called out, causing his heart to race. "Oh for God's sake Humphrey I know you're here" she walked around. "Humphrey!" she shouted. Dan dragged himself out of bed and saw her sitting on a stool reading a take out menu._

_"Blair what are you doing here?" he asked, pinching himself to make sure this was actually happening._

_"To see you of course" she said as if he just asked a ridiculously stupid question._

_"You- you can't keep doing this to me Blair. Being all nice one second and then flipping the next. You can't" he shook his head. "I can't cope"_

_"You don't want me here?" her lips trembled, her eyes grew wide._

_"I think you know the answer to that Waldorf" he smiled and walked over to where she stood and wrapped his arms around her._

_"I love you Dan" she stated. "But... Right now I can't. I need my best friend" she nestled her head on his shoulder._

_"Have I taken the title of Serena?" he exclaimed and she laughed in response._

_"You know what I mean" she said, still holding onto him._

_"I do"_

"She stayed the night. We watched a film and ordered take out. It was a nice night in. She slept in my bed and I slept on the couch. She of course complained about how my sheets didn't have a high thread count or the fact she had to sleep in one of his old t-shirts. But it put a smile on my face" he read the words he wrote years ago as if it happened yesterday. "And in that moment, although we both agreed we wouldn't be anything, I knew we'd have this connection forever" he took off his glasses.

"What happened next?" Amelia asked, smiling at her father.

"We remained friends" he closed the journal he was holding. "But really you could say we were more than that from time to time... but our official label was friends" he nodded. "She began to date Chuck again but that ended badly, and that's and understatement. I dated a few people but noone made me feel the way she made me feel" he smiled sadly. "The next big moment in our 'relationship' was a year after that night. It was the night of Aunt Serena and Uncle Nate's wedding"

"What happened?" she asked him when she had a clear idea anyway.

"I'll tell you tomorrow. That's enough for today" Dan got up and placed his journal next to the others and went to leave. "I know you might not think this right now but I do love your mother"

"I know you do" she looked at her hands as she replied, remembering her childhood.

"I'm glad"


	7. Chapter 7

Dan woke up with a start. His palms were sweaty and his face was warm. He rolled over to see his wife still lying there asleep. Seeing her resting peacefully made him smile. He got up slowly as his back was still aching and made his way downstairs to make a coffee.

"What are you doing up at this time Dad?" Amelia was sitting in an armchair in the corner doing a puzzle.

"I could ask you that" he responded as he waited for the kettle to boil. Amelia just looked at him with knowing eyes. "I had a bad dream that's all"

"What about?" she asked curiously. Dan poured the hot water into his mug and stirred leaving her in suspense.

"Old memories" he sat down in his chair and Amelia went back to her armchair. She sat hugging her knees, wanting to ask him to continue the story yet not wanting to upset him.

"So what happened at Aunt Serena and Uncle Nate's wedding?" she blurted out. She saw how her father's body stiffened at the mention of the story of his life, their life.

"Nate kind of set us up" he said shyly as if he were still a young man. "It was kind of funny actually-"

_"Hello!" Nate shouted as he tapped his fork against his glass to gather everyone's attention. People laughed at his approach. "First of all I'd like to say congratulations... to myself. I've managed to marry the most beautiful woman on the planet. So... Well done me!" he cheered, causing Serena to go bright red and the guests to laugh. "All joking aside, I'm honoured to be here with all of you. Thank you for joining us on this very special day" guests gave warm smiles to the golden boy standing infront of them. Nate turned so he was talking directly to Dan. "This day wouldn't of happened if it weren't for Dan" he moved his arm in his direction just to make sure everyone knew who his best man was even though he gave a speech ten minutes prior. "And Blair" he turned to look at Blair and gleamed at her. "Who looks very beautiful today. Serena and myself are two of the most unorganised people that I know. Dan and Blair sorted everything out to make this day as perfect as it was. It quite literally wouldn't have happened with out them" he smiled cheekily at the both of them. "They are the two funniest, most dedicated friends I know and not to mention the smartest. I don't know what they talk about most of the time" the guests laughed again, knowing Nate well enough to know that's probably true. "They are literally perfect" he said sincerly. And then whispered to the two of them "for each other". Nate smiled as Dan and Blair looked at each other as if they were seeing each other in a new light. "To Dan and Blair!" he cheered._

_"To Dan and Blair!"_

"Was he drunk?" Amelia asked.

"When isn't Uncle Nate drunk?" Dan laughed. "Or when doesn't he act like he is?"

"Good point, well made" Amelia smiled, now sitting with her long legs dangling over the side of the chair. "So what happened next?"

"Well-"

_Nate and Serena just had their first dance as man and wife. Everyone 'ooh'ed and 'aww'ed as two of the most genetically blessed people in the world glided across the floor._

_"Lovely wedding" Lily came over and looped her hand through Dan's. "The both of you, well done" she smiled at Blair who was standing next to Dan. "You two make quite the team"_

_"I guess we do" Dan smiled politely at Lily. Lily stood with the two of them until their first dance ended. She wiped her eyes and went to the bar to order a dry martini._

_"Care to dance Waldorf?" Dan held out his hand to her hoping she'd take it. His eyes lit up with she placed her hands in his._

_"I guess" she pulled him onto the dancefloor and swayed to the music._

_"You know Nate was right" Blair's breathing hitched. "You do look beautiful" Dan whispered in her ear._

_"Oh" Blair sighed, half relieved but half disappointed. "Thank you Humphrey. You don't look so bad yourself"_

_"I hope so as this is a ridiculously expensive suit" Dan laughed._

_"I know, I chose it for you"_

_"You have good taste"_

_The two of the continued to move to the beat, Blair's arms wrapped around his neck so that her fingers brushed against his soft curls and his hands planted firmly onto her waist. Couples moved off the dancefloor one by one, songs changed from pop to soul to rock, yet they still gazed into each others eyes, dancing as if it were still the slow song they started it out to be._

_"Let's get out of here" Blair suggested boldly. Before Dan could register what she actually said she had already pulled him off the dancefloor and out of the room. "Wait here"_

_Dan stood there on the spot as he watched Blair strut off towards the hotel desk. Dan forgot they organised the reception to be at The Plaza because it felt like so much more than that. Whatever Blair was asking for she got pretty quickly and rushed off back to Dan, grabbing his hand and waited for the elevator. "Blair?" Dan asked, oblivious to what was happening._

_The elevator dinged and she pushed him inside and pressed the button to the top floor. She turned around and threw herself on him._

_Her kiss was eager and desperate as if she had been waiting too long to do this. She pushed him against the back on the elevator and whilst connecting with his lips she fiddled with his shirt. He moved her thigh up his leg so he could push her dress up so it was around her waist revealing some very tiny black panties._

_The elevator opened and Dan pushed her other leg around his waist. She pulled on his hair as she pushed herself onto him even more as he walked into the suite. With her legs wrapped around his waist, he walked into the nearest bedroom and sat down on the bed._

_Without coming up for air, Blair ripped off his shirt to reveal his well toned body that made her groan into his mouth even louder. He pulled his lips away from hers to pull her dress off over her head causing her clip to fall out and her hair tumbling down. He kissed her jaw line, her neck, her collar bone, the curve of her breast, causing her to moan with desire. She pushed him down onto the bed so she was on top of him, unzipping his trousers and pulling them off so they were both there in nothing but their underwear. Dan pulled her face back to his. The tip of his tongue traced her dainty lips which made her more eager. He kissed her jaw line, her neck, her collar bone, the curve of her breast, her clevage, her stomach, her abdomen, pulling down those strategically planned lace panties down, reaching her centre causing her body to tremble and scream with pleasure._

"and we had... you know..." Dan said uncomfortably in his chair. Amelia looked at him as he was clearly remembering all the details but to spare her the mental images he just told her they danced and went to a hotel room.

"Yeah I can kinda gather" Amelia crinkled her nose. "Do you have a picture of you two at the wedding?"

Dan got up and went to the cabinet that contained all the family photos. He pulled out a battered white book that had _'N + S'_ on the front in fancy silver writing. He flicked through the pages until he found one.

"Here" he passed the book over. "This is one of Blair, Serena, Nate and myself" Amelia's mouth gaped as she stared at the impossibly good looking group of friends. "I know" Dan chuckled. "I was so handsome"

Amelia flicked through the pages of the wedding until she got to the page of the first dance of Nate and Serena. There were several pictures after that and in every single one she could spot her father and Blair swaying in the background, looking at each other with loving eyes. "Wow" she choked, tears forming in her eyes that she quickly got under control.

"I know" his eyes crinkled as he smiled.

"What happened after... You know..." Amelia shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

"We told each other that no matter what happened in the future, that night would be the best night of out lives" he sighed, knowing that it was definitely in the top five moments of his life. All of his top five moments were with Blair, except the arrival of Amelia.

"Did you two become official?" she asked.

"Why would we want to do that when sneaking around is so fun?"


	8. Chapter 8

Olivia had just stirred meaning it was almost half six in the morning. Dan and Amelia were still in the living room, talking about his old life.

"So you two snuck around?" Amelia asked.

"You could say that" Dan smiled to himself. "We only told Serena and Nate. That was it"

Amelia looked down. "How long did that last?"

"For almost a year and a half" Dan could feel his cheeks warming at the memories.

"What changed your mind?" Amelia asked.

_Blair was sitting in the loft in a pale yellow floral sundress as the heat from the city Summer was unbearable. She felt her phone vibrate and saw who it was._

_"What do you want Nate?" she asked irritably._

_"What a lovely greeting Blair. I'm fine how're you?" she could hear a flaw his sunny mood by the tone of his voice._

_"Nate. What is it?" she pressed on. All she wanted was a cold shower. With Dan Humphrey._

_"Chuck knows"_

_Blair immediately hung up and threw her phone on the floor. Her whole body froze as she knew what this meant._

_"Humphrey I'm leaving!" she shouted. He was out on the balcony doing a barbaque. Knowing he didn't hear she left him a note._

_'Something came up. So sorry. All my love, B'_

"So Chuck found out?" Amelia questioned.

"Oh yes he did" Dan said in a low voice. "And he wasn't too pleased. He went off on one saying that how dare she be with someone else for this long and how dare she not tell him" Dan frowned. "He said that Blair didn't love me because if she did she'd be telling the whole world. That she was ashamed of me"

Amelia heard the quiver in his voice. "Anybody would be lucky to have you Dad" Amelia reassured. "You were a great guy. You _are_ a great guy" she gave him a half smile trying to lift his mood.

"We didn't speak for a month or so" he continued. "But then she came over to apologise to me-"

_Blair stepped in the loft to find Dan on the sofa doing a crossword puzzle._

_"Hey" she said in a small voice and sat next to him, stroking his knee. She felt him stiffen from her touch. "I'm so sorry"_

_"For what?" Dan said without taking his eyes off the newspaper. "For being ashamed to date someone from _Brooklyn_?" he scribbled down an answer to the crossword puzzle._

_"I wasn't ashamed" she took the newspaper out of his hand so he could look at her. Relucantly he returned her gaze. "I didn't want to ruin what we have. It's too important to me. All of my relationships have been high profile and look how they turned out" she rubbed his leg again but this time his body remained relaxed. "What we have- it's the best thing going on for me right now. If everyone knew... I don't know. I didn't think it would be the same"_

_Dan took the newspaper off her and continued with his crossword puzzle. With one arm he pulled her in so her head rested on his chest. "I forgive you" he whispered. He could feel her cheeks form a smile. Blair looked up at him with such love in her eyes. Then she turned to the crossword puzzle._

_"Oh dear God Humphrey you are dreadful at crosswords" she ripped the paper out of his hands and snatched the pen. She tutted as she scribbled out his answers and corrected them but Dan couldn't help but grin at the wonderful woman perched on his shoulder as she corrected his mistakes._

"She stopped over and the next day we went out. We went to Central Park to feed the ducks. We then went to a coffee shop where Blair saw some of our old classmates from Constance and St. Judes. She introduced me as her boyfriend" he couldn't help but grin widely at the memory. "It made me ridiculously happy"

"I bet it did" Amelia chuckled at her father reminising the past. "What happened after you two became official?"

"Where do I begin..."


	9. Chapter 9

"Morning you two" Olivia entered dressed in a mauve t-shirt, cream slacks with a green apron on with a green visor. Today was another hot day so she was going to continue with the garden. "Have you seen my gloves?"

"By the microwave mom" Amelia called.

"Thanks" she was about to leave the back door to enter the garden. "By the time I get back in I hope you two will be out of your pajamas"

"Can't promise anything" Dan chuckled and Amelia joined in. Olivia just rolled her eyes.

"So, what happened?" Amelia asked.

"The process took just under a year" he said. "I didn't even realise it was happening-"

_Dan came home from work everyday to realise that something was different. Whether it was the plug in air freshner or the expensive washing up liquid, the new rug or the scented candles, the new lampshade or the evergrowing stash of her clothes there, something changed everyday. Furniture would be rearranged for 'Feng Shui' but then returned back to normal because it conflicted with another belief. Books would be rearranged as Blair couldn't decide whether she prefered it in order of genre, author, favourites, alphabetised, alphabetised within genres or just completely random. Within months it turned from his place to their place._

_It was a Saturday when Nate came over after a game of football in the park when he noticed the new addition to the loft which was a large bowl of potpourri in the corner._

_"Seriously dude" Nate said as he put his bag on the floor. "Do you not see what's going on here?" he exclaimed._

_"I don't see anything... But I can smell something. And it's nice" he commented. Nate whacked his arm. "Ow!"_

_"She's turning your place, your bachelor pad, into a couple's paradise!" Nate yelled._

_"Bachelor pad, really Nate? The only girl I've had up here in the past couple of years is Blair" he got a bottle of beer out of the fridge for him and Nate. "I don't mind anyway. She's made it look nice"_

_"Oh mate you are so whipped!" Nate chuckled as he took a sip of his beer. "As long as you're happy dude"_

_"I am" he said honestly._

_"This happened with Serena when I got my own place. We just started seeing each other again and she stopped there all the time. But after a couple of months she had transformed it into her place. But she only started to spend every day and night there when she brought her toothbrush. Then you're in for hell" After half a bottle of beer Nate started trying to be the wise one. "She hasn't brought her toothbrush yet has she?"_

_"Nope" Dan took a swig of beer._

_"Good. You don't want her to" Nate smiled. "Not that Blair isn't great and all... Believe me, I know she is" Dan cringed at the fact they used to be in a pretty serious relationship around the time he was with Serena. "But Serena is more laid back than Blair... And look where I am now. Married with a kid on the way, stuck in a job that I hate" Nate moaned._

_"But you love her" Dan said simply._

_"More than anything" Nate sunk into his chair._

_"Then I guess it's worth it in the end" Dan got up to get more beers when the loft door opened._

_"Hello, not going to be here long just needed to changed my clothes and have a shower" she leaned to kiss Dan on the cheek. "By the smell of it you need to do the same"_

_"Ha ha ha ha" Dan said sarcastically. He moved to sit on the sofa and Blair began to unzip her dress._

_"Hey! Dan has company!" Nate yelled covering his eyes._

_"Oh my God" Blair screamed before she ran to the bathroom to run her shower._

_The boys chatted and played some XBox when Blair came out of Dan's room looking refreshed from her shower and cooler in her new outfit._

_"See you later" she kissed Dan on the lips goodbye. "See you later Nate"_

_"Bye Blair" Nate sighed. "Right, I need a wee" Dan pulled a face as if you say 'too much information'. Nate got up to go to the bathroom when he called his name. "Dan! Come here!"_

_"Oh dude I'd rather not. Last time you did it was because you thought you had a kink in your dick and I'm still traumatised by that" Dan yelled back._

_"I'm all covered up! But don't act like you didn't love it" he could hear Nate's smirk in his voice. "But seriously, come here"_

_Dan got up from the sofa to join his friend in the bathroom. He didn't say anything, just pointed._

_Right next to Dan's blue toothbrush was Blair's pink one._

"So she moved in?" Amelia asked.

"No" Dan shook his head. Amelia looked confused. "Well yes, in the end. But not then"

"Well why not?"

Dan thought of how he would phrase it. "Nate kind of freaked me out. I was scared that she thought this meant we'd be getting married and having children soon. I just wasn't ready for it. I would've done it if that's what she wanted but I just felt scared" he admitted. "So when I accused her of trying to pressure me into more it turned into a blazing arguement and Blair and her toothbrush moved back to the Upper East Side"

Amelia changed position on the chair again so she could rest her elbow on her knee. "So when did she move in?"

"Properly? About a month later. We were both too stubborn to say we were sorry but being apart made us miserable. I was so used to having her there with me, her falling asleep in my arms and waking up to smelling her hair" he yawned trying to cover up the smile he had when remembering exactly how her hair smelled. "I was the first to call her to say sorry and she was over within half an hour. The next week her toothbrush made itself at home standing next to mine"

Dan looked over at his daughter. She had his dark brown hair and his warm eyes. Her face was rounder than his but he prefered it. Her feautures we more like Olivia's but her personality and intellect were exactly the same as his. He wonders why he loves her more than Tom. Ever since Tom was born he resented him. He didn't know why and hated himself for it. But his love for Amelia was always evident.

"Come on dad, let's get some breakfast. Or brunch"


	10. Chapter 10

The sun was shining high in the sky without any clouds for company. Olivia was still in the garden, wiping sweat off her forehead occasionally and replacing it with dirt. Amelia came out with a sandwich and a drink.

"Thanks love" Olivia said to her as if she were talking to her plants. Amelia nodded but stayed where she was. Olivia stood up to have the glass of water and noticed Amelia's concerned eyes. "Is he okay?"

"We just had brunch. He's having a nap" she reported. Her mother held a tight smile.

"Has he had another episode?" she asked to which Amelia shook her head. "Good. I'm surprised really" she turned look her directly in the eye. "What have you two been talking about?"

"Just talking about memories about the Upper East Side" she said casually, missing out the very important subject. "He remembers everything. Smells, speech" she sighed with relief. "He isn't even reading out of his journal. I noticed yesterday when it looked as if he was going to have another episode, I asked him about his memories. And it seems to be delaying it" Amelia smiled brightly. "He _remembers_"

"He's getting better" Olivia smiled at her daughter who's expression matched hers. "I'll call Doctor Wilson later so he can do a check up, see what there is to do now"

"Okay" Amelia bit her lip. "I'll wait for dad to wake up so I can distract him. All you need to do is get him talking about memories he loved the most and he seems like himself. His old self"

"Really? I didn't know he loved the Upper East Side so much. He wanted to get out the city as soon as possible" Olivia pulled a face, getting back onto her knees so she could attack the weeds.

"He really loved it there" Amelia smiled, turned her back on her mother and went inside to wait for her father to wake up.

It was around two in the afternoon when he woke up. Amelia could've sworn he whispered 'Blair' when he woke up and looked at Amelia with wide, anxious eyes. Amelia got worried and moved to sit by him. She held his hand in hers.

"So what happened after Blair moved in?" Amelia asked, keen to distract him.

"She-" he looked at his daughter and relaxed. "She got a job at a high end fashion magazine whilst I interned for The New Yorker as well as working on my second novel which I hoped would be the first to be published. We hardly had any spare time but when we did it was magical. On an odd day off work-"

_It was in the middle of Winter and the snow was falling thick and fast. Dan looked out of his window with delight._

_"I love snow" he gleamed. He turned to see Blair lying on their bed staring intently at her phone. "What is it?"_

_"I've got the day off work because of the snow!" she shrieked with excitement._

_"I had this day booked off anyway to do some DIY..." he turned to look at her, lying on their bed. Dan jumped into bed and wrapped his arms around her and pressed his lips against hers._

_"So we both have the day off?" Blair asked as he began to kiss her jawline._

_"Mmm-mhm" he said as he kissed her neck, his warm breath causing the hair on the back of Blair's neck to stand on end. He soon parted her legs where he fitted so perfectly inbetween as she took off his pajama top and he pulled off her silk slip._

_"Well this could be fun"_

_After their hot morning in bed, they slowly got out only to wrap up in knitwear and sweats. Blair decided it were best if she did the DIY ('last time I asked you to do the shelf you did a terrible job' she critised. 'So I'm going to do it. Afterall, I'd do a better job that you Humphrey') and Dan made waffles. Sure enough, Blair did a brilliant job on fixing the odd jobs around the loft and Dan made his best ever waffles._

_"Dan... I've been thinking..." Blair began as she finished her waffles and patted her mouth clean._

_"Oh God, what?" Dan asked, wondering what she wanted to redecorate now._

_"I want to start a family" she said simply causing Dan's mouth to gape. "With you"_

_"Now I was wondering who with then. I know the guy from the foreign language theatre thinks you're pretty but I didn't know you felt the same way!" Dan mocked causing Blair to giggle._

_"So? What do you think?" she asked, nervous to what his response was going to be._

_He didn't need to think. "Yes"_

"For the next couple of months we started trying but each time her period came and I'd suffer a week of blame for not getting her pregnant" he chuckled at how Blair once threw a shoe at him in frustration when she came on. "We thought it wasn't going to happen"

"And did it?" she asked, feeling down.

_It was Valentine's day, just over a year since they started trying to concieve. Dan was decorating the appartment when Blair came running in._

_"Blair! You're not supposed to see this" Dan exclaimed but Blair was bobbing up and down on the spot, holding a white and blue stick._

_"We did it Dan! We did it!"_


	11. Chapter 11

Amelia sunk back in her seat, still holding her father's hand but was no longer stroking it in comfort.

"She was pregnant" Amelia didn't question it.

Dan paused. "Yes"

Amelia choked, feeling uncomfortable. She knew that mom would be calling Doctor Wilson soon and that he would arrive later that evening so she pressed on. "What happened?"

"We went for regular scans to double check the baby was alright. Her bump was becoming visible and I've never seen her smile like she did whenever she was told the baby was doing well, both she and it were healthy. It was the 20 week check up when..." he felt hot tears come to his eyes.

_Dan was sitting on a stool next to the bed where Blair was lying with the midwife scanning her stomach. Occasionally she would complain about the gel being too cold which made Dan smile._

_"Okay... so here it is" she showed them their baby on the screen. "The baby is doing fine" Blair's smile increased and Dan sighed with relief. "Moving right, in a nice position" the midwife observed the screen. "Would you like to know the sex of the baby?"_

_Blair turned her head to look at Dan. She knew he didn't want to know but she so desperately wanted to. As if Dan knew what she was thinking, he broke off their gaze and looked at their midwife. "Yes"_

_"I can tell you you'll be a..." she double checked the screen as Dan and Blair waited anxiously. "A boy. Congratulations" she grinned at the couple. She loved being in screenings with these two. She knew the baby would be in a great home with loving parents because out of every couple she'd seen in her fifteen years of being a midwife, this couple looked more in love everyday._

_Dan coughed as if he didn't believe it, Blair's grip on his hand tightened as she was so happy. Dan left the room for her to get changed, running his fingers through his hair. _I'm going to be a dad_, he told himself. _To a beautiful baby boy_. He couldn't believe his luck._

Amelia stared at her father whose eyes began to fill with tears. She felt the need to reassure him but felt uncomfortable. She shifted uncomfortably in her chair when she saw her mother in the window.

"Four" she mouthed to Amelia. Amelia looked confused so Olivia pointed at the clock, which currently said 3.41pm and put up four fingers. Amelia grasped on to what she meant so she turned to her father and continued their talk.

"Then what?"

"We stood outside the doctor's for a while, talking about the baby and plans for the day-"

_"I need to go to the office now" Blair gasped as she completely forgot she had a meeting soon. "Oh my God I need to go now"_

_Dan rubbed her shoulder, trying to calm her down. "It's okay, we'll get you a cab"_

_They saw a cab on the other side of the street and Dan waved at the driver. He nodded as if to say he were free and Dan kissed Blair on the forehead._

_"I'll see you back at the loft?" Blair asked as she was about to cross the road._

_"You bet you will" he smiled, still on the high he felt after that meeting._

_"I love you Dan" she said as she pressed her lips against his. She turned to cross the road to get to the cab._

_"I love you more!" Dan shouted. Blair turned around on the spot to see the man she loved most look at her with excited eyes. Blair's heart swelled._

_"Impossi-"_

_In that moment Dan's heart stopped. A car came speeding past and knocked Blair right off her feet so she landed face down in the middle of the road. Screams could be heard, people went rushing over. But Dan couldn't see or hear it all with the blood rushing to his head._

_"Someone call 911!" Someone yelled and soon enough there were several people dialling frantically on their phones. Dan remained frozen as if he were a statue, unable to move even if he wanted to._

_Sirens could be heard on their way to the scene when Dan snapped out of his state of mind. He rushed over to see her lying on the floor, cuts all over her delicate skin and her beautiful face covered with blood from the blow. Dan stroked her hair, whispering to himself everything was going to be alright._

_"I know I'm not a believer" Dan said to himself, causing people to stare. "And I know I have know right to ask. But not her. Not today. Just..." he felt the blood rush to his head again, feeling dizzy. "Please let her be okay" he prayed, looking up at the sky. "I'm begging you"_

Dan remained still in his chair as he relived the experience he told himself he would forget. Amelia, wiping her eyes with her sleeves, was holding onto her father as if for dear life.

The doorbell rung and Olivia rushed out of the garden to answer it. "Hello Stuart" she smiled kindly.

"Hello Olivia. Where's Dan" he asked with a tone of self importance.

"Right through there" and she pointed in the direction she pointed to.

He was greeted by the sight of Dan sitting in his chair looking stiff and unrelaxed as his daugher cradled him.

"Mr. Humphrey?" Doctor Wilson asked but Dan didn't respond, not even with a look. With a raised voice he said louder "Mr. Humphrey!"

_"Mr. Humphrey, please, calm down" a young Doctor tried to reassure him as he tried to push past him._

_"Let me see her" he said through gritted teeth with Serena, Nate, Eleanor and Cyrus looking at him with matching worried expressions._

_"I'm afraid you can't at the moment" he said in a calm voice. His blond hair scraped back made it look like he was trying to act older than his years which irritated Dan more._

_"Let me see her! I need to!" Dan yelled, making the nurses look up and run over to the Doctor for reinforcement._

_"You can't at the moment" he repeated. "I understand how you're feeling-"_

_"- No you don't understand how I'm feeling!" Dan screamed. "No you don't! You didn't just see the woman you loved most get hit by a car! You don't have someone who means everything to you, as well as carrying your child, in intensive care and might not survive! You don't have your _life_ in a room, struggling to breath. You don't have your life slipping away" his voice grew small. "You don't- you don't" and that's when the sobbing finally begun._

"Get away from me" Dan shoved Amelia away from him. "Who are you?" he questioned, staring his daughter straight in the eye. Olivia took a step back, unable to watch. "Where am I?" a tone of anger was evident in his voice. "What's happened? Where's Blair?" he asked, worried. His eyes began to fill with water.

"Blair?" Olivia questioned, never hearing that name before.

"Yes, Blair! Where is she? Is she okay?" he got up to shake Doctor Wilson as if he could simply shake the information out of him.

"Who is Blair Mr. Humphrey?" he asked, holding onto the elderly man infront of him, trying to calm him down.

Dan took a step back and hit a wall. He slid down it until he was sitting on the floor, tears pouring onto his clothes.

_"Dan, we need to get you changed" Serena came over, her eyes swollen from crying so much. "We need to get you home"_

_"She's gone" he simply stated, feeling a hole form in his heart. "They're gone"_

_"I know" her lip trembled. "Come on, let's get you home"_

_Dan hugged his knees as he sat on the floor with Serena trying to get him up. Nate came round the corner with Rufus, shock and sadness visible in his eyes._

_"Son" Rufus spoke softly. "Let's go back home, to the loft"_

_"I can't" Dan said. "That was _our_ home" tears continued to stream down his face. He had no control over them. "I can't go back there"_

"I can't go back there" Dan screamed as Doctor Wilson suggested taking him back to the mental hospital. "No, I can't go back there"

"I'm afraid you have no choice" he said, trying to keep his composure. He dialled a number to get reinforcement.

"You" Dan pointed at Amelia who stood in the corner, hot tears falling down her face. "Who are you?"

"I'm your daughter" she said simply, hoping that would be enough.

"Lies" he said sourly. "Lies! I only have a son"

"Yes, yes! Tom!" Olivia said enthusiastically.

"Who are you?" he asked bitterly, staring at her as if she were dirt. "Where's Blair? I need to see Blair"

"Who's Blair?" Olivia asked with a concerned expression.

"Blair isn't here Dan" Doctor Wilson informed him, causing him to break down once again.

_"He just keeps breaking down" Nate informed Rufus as Serena stayed with Dan on the floor. "I feel so helpless"_

_"There's nothing right to do in these situations" Rufus reassured him. "You're doing great just being here, showing you're here for him" Rufus smiled at him. Nate returned, thankful to know he wasn't failing at being his friend._

_"I want to see her" Dan said, interupting the silence. "I- I need to say goodbye"_

"Where's Blair?" Dan shouted. Amelia got out of the corner.

"You need to say goodbye to her Dad. Once and for all" she said resulting in his eyes widening.

"I love her" he said simply, breaking Olivia's heart in the process. "I always will"

_Dan entered the room alone. She was lying there on the bed, cuts and bruises covering her pale skin. He moved to sit by her, held onto her hand and wished that she would open her eyes and tell him she was okay. She never did._

_"I don't know what I'm going to do with out you. Who else is going to tell me I'm being insufferable or compliment me on making waffles?" he let out a small laugh but it was quickly suppressed by sorrow. "You are my life Blair Waldorf" he reached into his pocket and got out a small red box. He opened it to reveal a diamond ring with such clarity it sparkled without much light. Just like his feelings for her. "I was going to propose later tonight. It took me a while to save up for this, otherwise I would've done it much sooner" he chucked, slipping the extravagant ring onto her cold, dainty finger. "I love you so much, Blair Humphrey" he smiled to himself at the sound of her name. "I always will"_


	12. Not a new chapter

So, I have finished the story but I thought I'd do this to answer some of the questions in reviews and what not, and add a litle extra insight.

Amelia found one of his journals and read a page about it which Dan talked about missing Blair etc. Dan has dementia which was pretty severe but he seemed to be getting better, hence why he was at home with his wife and daughter. He was due an episode but it didn't happen, so Olivia and Amelia were relieved yet on edge for it to happen. I think in chapter 3 (?) he has a go at Amelia and begins to cry. Amelia knew that if you get him talking about an old memory it stopped these mini episodes so when she read the journal entry he thought that asking about her would delay it. And it did. Until he got to talking about her death which causes him to switch and forget everything except Blair. All he remembers is Blair. Sorry if I didn't get that across, or I got it across too late. Someone asked if she wanted to know about Blair so Amelia could write a story which I thought would've been quite interesting but unfortunately I read it too late.

Also, the reason why Dan didn't like Tom was because his first born should've been the baby Blair was carrying, and the fact he was a boy as well made him have the grudge. He tried to get by it but there was always a slight tension between them.

Olivia didn't know anything about Blair, didn't know that she was the love of his life or that he was pregnant with his child. He didn't tell her and told Serena and Nate not to either.

I can't think of anything else, so if you have any questions I'll be happy to answer them. Thanks for reviewing and enjoying my story, means a lot :)


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